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Dungeons & Dragons – The Night of no Tomorrow

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By Joshie Jaxon

Hey, look! The Dungeons & Dragons ride! Six children enter. How many leave? None. Because they’re pulled through a portal, and arrive in a strange land, dressed in strange clothes. Before they can figure out where they are, a five-headed dragon (FHD) attacks them. A creepy little toad looking guy tells them not to fear. Ranger, Barbarian, Magician, Thief, Cavalier, and Acrobat. No sooner do try get their power items, but they run face to face with Venger. The FHD tries to blast him, and Venger flees. Toad man tells the group that he is called Dungeon Master, and he will be their guide in the realm of Dungeons & Dragons. That’s a lot to take in during the opening credits. A know I watched this show as a kid, because I remember that opening sequence, but that’s all. I know Venger usually makes the great 80’s villains lists, but he just isn’t ringing any bells. Maybe he’ll win me over as we continue. Knowing nothing of D&D, I don’t know if there are any “in” jokes about or from the game. That being said, I love 80’s toons, so let the geeks begin! 

  

We open on the group climbing a mountain. They have names, but I’m not going to bother learning them, when I can refer to them by their class, like any good republican would. The barbarian encourages the little unicorn, aptly named Uni, to hurry up the mountain. They marvel at the view, and the echoes. Cavalier tells the thief to get control of her brother. She says he isn’t bothering anyone. Cavalier says he’s bothering him, and he’s trying to think of a way home. I wonder if they’ve tried clicking their heels together three times. The barbarian encourages Uni to try the echo. When he/she/it neighs/bleats/whatever, there’s no echo. Uni tries again, but this time we hear the roar of Tiamat the dragon (FHD). The dragon wants to know why they woke her. Barbarian charges at her, as his thief sister tells him that FHD is indestructible. Ranger shoots a magic arrow to knock barbarian out of the way of the fire, lightning, energy blast from three of the heads. Thief lures the dragon back to cave from whence it came, and uses her invisibility cloak to get away. Her barbarian brother knocks a boulder down to block the entrance. Acrobat says she can understand why Venger is afraid of that dragon. You should be too, sweetie. It has five heads.

  

Dungeon Master appears, and congratulates them. Cavalier is sick of DM’s riddles, and wants a straight answer on how to get home. Patience, all things have a purpose, including their being there. I have a feeling this series is gonna end with them always having the power to return home. Call it a hunch. DM tells the group to go north, to Helix. There, they might, keyword MIGHT find something that will assist them on their way home. Helix was once terrorized by dragons. They were ruled by the face of evil, Venger. You shall know him by his white hair. Um, Venger wears a helmet, we can’t see his hair. Oh well. DM walks behind a rock and disappears. Cavalier hates it when he does that. Didn’t they just get there in the opening credits? How long have these kids been there? Thief is worried. Acrobat says she’s always worried. DM said they should go north, so that’s what they should do. Did I mention Acrobat is a sassy black girl? If I were a different sort of comic, I would call her Afrobat. Alas, I’m not a Lampanelli, a Rivers, or even a Rickles, so I’ll stick with Acrobat. On second thought, it’s too good a name to pass up. Afrobat, ho! 

  

All this time walking is a waste of time. Cavalier would give anything for dad’s limo. Barbarian would give the limo for a peanut butter and banana sandwich. Magician says he’ll make magic burgers. Cavalier says last time they got live turkeys. Hey, he couldn’t help it if the hat thought it was Thanksgiving. He tries for burgers, and gets a live cow. Sassy Afrobat says she likes her burgers more well done than that. None of them has a sword, since we have to think of the children, even though He-Man, Lion-O, Skelletor, Conan, and Voltron all had swords, so the magician tries to get the cow back in his hat. No fresh burgers today. The party passes a sign that says they’re near Merlin’s castle. Then they pass a sign saying it’s the way they came. They can’t figure it out. Afrobat says they forgot to look up. Cue the floating castle in the sky. If only they had a way up. Cue the magical golden ladder. Kids, you’re in a strange land being guided by toady little creep, perhaps you should just think twice about climbing the ladder. They ignore my advice, and climb. They do however think twice about Venger and his white hair. I wonder if that’s about to be important.

  

Cavalier says they have a place like this in Malibu, and wishes he were there. So do your friends. Ranger suggests he swim across the moat, but cavalier isn’t into skydiving. Afrobat says she can handle it, and uses her staff to jump the sky moat, and lower the draw bridge. They enter the castle and meet Merlin, who not only has white hair, but a white rabbit. Merlin says he can do many things, but he can’t grow hair. He removes his hat, with attached wig to reveal that he’s bald. He guides the children to his cauldron. Warning bells, anyone? Bueller? Bueller? Anyhow, Merlin says he can’t help them home, but he can tell them about where they’re headed. Helix fought against a conqueror, who vowed vengeance upon his defeat. Barbarian says that DM told them this already. Ah, but what he didn’t tell you is one year, Merlin appeared, cast a spell, and used his good magic to banish the evil dragons forever. Anyone else notice that Merlin referred to himself in the third person? Anyone else think that rabbit is a hare? If so, we can still be friends. Cavalier says if Merlin isn’t going to help, then he’s leaving. He opens the door, and is face to faces with FHD.

  

Barbarian charges at her. Merlin uses magic to get him to safety. He tells the kids they must leave. Ranger offers to distract it while the others get away. Afrobat, and not Merlin, whose castle this allegedly is, directs them out the door. They close the door, and reinforce it with a wooden beam. Yeah, a gigantic, not to mention fire-breathing, dragon is gonna be stopped by a door. Then again a door held Hurt, Tennant, and Smith in the Tower of London, so why not. Merlin says there’s no escape from the dungeon. Wait, they wanna trap a dragon in the dungeon. Isn’t that a little, I dunno, majorly obvious? Magician conjures a carpet to cover the entrance, while Afrobat lures FHD over. The dragon falls for the trap, cause not one of it’s five heads had a brain. Merlin and the others use another wooden post to hold the wooden dungeon entrance closed. They never learn. Thief gives Merlin back his bunny, but he corrects her that it’s a hare. Merlin thanks them for saving his life. Life? They thought he was supposed to live forever. Oh, goodness no, he’s only seventy. He’s at that age where he wants to pass on his magical secrets, perhaps to magician? Only if he stays for the rest of his life. The group says that magician would never leave them. Wait for it, he’s leaving them to become Merlin’s apprentice. 

  

The party leaves, heading for Helix. Meanwhile, Merlin says they’ll have to deal with the dragon in the dungeon. How? Merlin says his spell book has the answers to all questions, and with that dangling carrot, he orders his new apprentice to stir the cauldron until he returns. Magician can’t resist, and ignores the cauldron to read. We know time passed based on the candle burning down. Thinking he’s found the right one, he raids the pantry for ingredients, and adds them to the cauldron. After the last one is added, smoke starts to rise, and takes the shape of a dragon. Uh oh. This won’t get him home. Yes, that was his first concern, before calling for help. He tracks down Merlin, who knows exactly what he did. Mainly because he switched the spells. Only good magic could undo Merlin’s spell. Wait a sec, there’s that third person speak again. You’re Merlin, aren’t you? The magician finally asks. Merlin says that Merlin has been dead a thousand years; he’s better known as Venger! He takes magician’s hat, and goes after Helix. 

  

Town of Helix, festival celebrating the defeat of the dragons. Ranger says he’s looking for a way home. Barbarian and Uni are busy hitting rocks with his club. Thief and Afrobat are at a fortune teller. She looks in the crystal, telling them she sees fortune for them. A second later, she’s saying the dragons will return. Ranger tells the mayor that he’s not sure why they’re there, but at least he got to meet Merlin. The mayor says that’s impossible, as he’s been dead a thousand years. He passed shortly after casting the spell that defeated Venger’s dragons. Um, Venger is over a thousand? Clearly he’s already got power and longevity. Why is he targeting Earth kids? Oh, that’s right, the Deus ex machina. Fortune teller runs to the mayor, saying the dragons are back. Thief and Afrobat say they need to go get Merlin. Ranger says it wasn’t Merlin. Afrobat says they saw him, he was there, stroking his white rabbit. No, ranger corrects her, it was his hare; his WHITE HARE! Afrobat says they thought they meant hair on your head, not hare. And with that, she loses a few points, and so do children everywhere collectively, since they didn’t have to figure it out on their own. They need to get magician away from Venger. They’ll need horses. Check the stables. 

  

The dragons start to destroy Helix. The mayor says it’s not the worst of it. Legend says the final assault will come soon, and the town will be completely destroyed. Wait, what legend? This is the first we’re hearing about a legend. Sigh. Ranger says Venger must have reversed Merlin’s spell. The one that kept the dragons away. Yes, thief, good girl. Double sigh. They reach Merlin’s castle, and luckily this is the 80’s, and Venger didn’t bother to pull the ladder up to prevent intruders. The group rushes upstairs, to discover magician playing with the hare. Not tied up. Not locked up. Free to come and go if he pleases. Ranger tells him that he needs to cast Merlin’s spell again. Venger says he won’t be casting any more spells tonight. He has the wizard hat, and now he wants the other objects of power too. Barbarian clubs the ground until books rain down on Venger. Ranger tells the group to keep him busy, while he and magician cast Merlin’s spell. Cavalier asks if they’re supposed to tell Venger jokes. Thief has an idea.

  

In the cauldron room, magician is saying he can’t do this, as ranger gives him a pep talk. Venger enters the chamber and says it’s over. Meanwhile, thief asks the group what’s the one thing Venger fears? FHD! They’re gonna let the dragon loose? Don’t they have enough problems? Venger continues to menace the others, saying he’ll add all their powers to his own. Cue FHD through the wall. Venger turns his attention to the immediate threat, and blasts at it, before fleeing, saying he’ll win in the end. FHD follows him through another wall. 

  

Time to see if magician can save the day, er, night. In the name of Merlin! In the time of sorrow! Banish winged demons! Let there be tomorrow! The dragons in Helix disappear, and the group celebrates back on the ground. The ladder and the castle disappear, and magician says now he’ll never get his hat back. Well, maybe you should’ve looked for it before leaving, genius. DM appears, and gives him back his hat. Cavalier says why can’t he return them home, but DM is already gone. Ranger tells magician that in Helix, he’s a hero. They all decide to ride there. Cavalier says he won’t share a horse. Magician conjures up the cow from earlier. Credits

  

Not a bad premier. I got a better idea of the kids’ personalities and motivations than I did Venger’s. It left a lot of questions unanswered. Why does Venger love his hare? Did Glenn Close get one in the past? Is that why he’s called “Venger”, cause he’s avenging his old fluffy friend? Why would Venger leave his hare with magician? Why are the kids going along with DM’s orders? The most important question though is, how did FHD get through the castle undetected the first time, since she clearly doesn’t use doors? I’ll leave you to ponder that. Until next time, stay geeky, and keep gabbing! 

  

TCG Tuesday – Yugioh, Card Basics 

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By Joshie Jaxon

Ever since I was 5, I’ve been a video gamer. Geek confession, I’ve never even played D&D. Please don’t think less of me for that. I never got into tabletop games that weren’t board games. That all changed around 2002. Having been introduced to the Yugioh anime, I wanted to be a duelist myself. On my 21st birthday I was gifted Yugi’s dueling deck, and I’ve been hooked ever since. As the title suggests, in today’s post I’m going to cover some basics of, you guessed it, the Yugioh Trading Card Game. Let the geeks begin! 

 
Monster cards – 

Monsters are the main cards you use to battle your opponent with.
Levels – Monster cards are assigned levels, based on the stars * that they have on them, ranging from level 1 to level 10. 

   
 
Categories – Monster cards have a variety of categories that they fall into; Normal, Effect, Ritual, Fusion, Synchro, and Xyz.

  

Type – Monster cards are divided into 24 types; Dragon, Spellcaster, Zombie, Warrior, Beast-Warrior, Beast, Winged Beast, Fiend, Fairy, Insect, Dinosaur, Reptile, Fish, Sea Serpent, Machine, Thunder, Aqua, Pyro, Rock, Plant, Psychic, Divine-Beast, Creator God and Wyrm. There are also Sub-types; Tuner, Gemini, Toon, Spirit, and Union. 
Attribute – Light, Dark, Earth, Wind, Fire, Water, and Divine. 

  

I’ll go into details on some of the above info in subsequent posts. They deserve more attention than just “basics”. For now though, let’s continue with the monster basics. 
Attack (ATK) / Defense (DEF) – 

Each monster card has attack and defense points. Usually these are within a handful of points of each other, making the monster balanced for offense or defense. There are times, however, when a monster is built to be an offensive or defensive monster. For example, although both are Elemental Heroes, Clayman has a much higher defense than offense, 2000 DEF vs 800 ATK, while Burstinatrix has a higher offensive stat, 1200 ATK vs 800 DEF. 

  

Description/Effect – The text for the card. In the case of Normal monsters, it is a description or bio of the monster. For Effect monsters, it is a description of what their effect is. Once again, I’ll use Elemental Heroes as an example. Sparkman gives us a bio about him being a warrior of light, whereas all we know about Wildheart is that he’s unaffected by the effect of traps. Poor Wildheart, no one knows anything about him. I get that these are playing cards, and space is limited, but even a tiny bio sentence, something. We want something to connect with besides the visual. I guess there always the anime, but not all cards get featured. 

  

Personally, I love the variety of the types of monsters you can get. There’s something for everyone, depending on your personality, and preferences. Not only can you pick monsters that are right for you, there is amazing artwork for each one. Generally, the subject is front and center, with an appropriate background for their element or type. Some cards just speak to a part of you, and you can’t explain why. I have an affinity for spellcasters, dragons, fiends, and heroes (warriors) myself. Not to say the other types aren’t great, because they are, but I don’t feel a compulsion towards them. I wonder if I could come up with a personality profile based on the types of monsters that people prefer. Perhaps it’s already been done. I don’t wanna get distracted and go look. Maybe later. Where was I? Oh yes, 
Spell cards – 

Originally called Magic cards, but I assume the people at Magic the Gathering had a problem with that, so it was changed. They’ll get their own spotlight post, but spells do a variety of things from direct damage, increase attack/defense, summon other monsters, and even change the playing field. In total there are 6 types of spell cards; Normal, Quick play, Equip, Field, Ritual, and Continuous 

   
 
Trap cards – 

The beauty of trap cards is their simplicity. Set it, and wait for the perfect time to spring it. The fewest type of cards available, there are only 3 types of trap cards; Normal, Continuous, and Counter. Three is more than enough though. They can destroy a monster instantly, or stop them in their tracks, and that’s just the beginning.

  

I could go on, as this is a subject I know a great deal about, but that would deviate from today’s theme. To summarize, dueling, good. Having no one to play with, bad. Get out there and find some friends whose butts you wouldn’t mind kicking, or potentially getting kicked by. Remember, no one likes a sore loser, but an ungracious winner is just as bad. It’s all meant to be fun, it is a game after all. Until next time, stay geeky, and keep dueling! 

  

Batman (1966) – Hi Diddle Riddle 

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By Joshie Jaxon

Nah nah nah nah nah nah, Batman! Adam West before he was Mayor West. Gorshin, Meredith, Romero, Newmar, Kitt, Meriwether. I loved the way these people portrayed some of Batman’s greatest villains. I loved the movie as a kid, and still enjoy it as an adult, but that’s a subject for a later post. I have vague memories of the Batman tv show, but I know I’ve seen it before. There are a few distinct scenes that stand out. It must have been reruns on what was then Nick at Night. Either way, camp value, and bulge appreciation have only increased with time. Don’t know what I mean? You will. Let the geeks begin!

  

Gotham City World’s Fair. Moldavian exhibit. Prime minister’s friendship luncheon. Before we unveil the exhibit, there is a small ceremony. Two turban-clad men bring out a cake with what one can only assume is a Moldavian shaking hands with Uncle Sam. As he cuts the cake, it explodes. People scream and run, as the cops look for something to shoot. Not much has changed in fifty years. Anyhow, a small parachute falls to the ground. The officer opens it and reads the riddle contained within; why is an orange like a bell? Gotham City Police Headquarters. Commissioner Gordon asks his officers if they know what this means. Chief O’Hara says, the Riddler. Yes, the prince of puzzlers. They like royalizing the villains. I know the Joker is the clown prince of crime, but that’s another episode. Gordon asks the officers if they can handle it, and they all look at the red phone, under glass, I presume to keep it fresh. While we’re at it, the police pretty much just told their boss that they’re useless, and to call in outside assistance. How are they still employed? 

  

Anyhow, Gordon removes the glass, and presses the only button on the phone. In Wayne Manor, Alfred answers, “I’ll call him, sir”. Telling us that the police know that Batman has someone to answer his phone for him. We’re forty years away from the iBat, I suppose. At any rate, in his living room, Bruce Wayne is having what appears to be a board meeting. Alfred approaches, and tells him that it’s the bat phone. Bruce tells the group that he’s just been reminded that he’s promised to take his ward, Dick Grayson, fishing. He walks out of the meeting, presumably to go fishing. I get that he’s a millionaire, but that is so unprofessional. I know we’re discussing the Gay Geek Gabbiness of Batman, but I was just reminded that I promised to take my nephews to Build A Bear. Excuse me. See? That wouldn’t fly. Granted, the future of the company isn’t as important as spending alone time with one’s young companion. Maybe the staff think he’s diddling Dick, and they accept that as an idiosyncrasy of their playboy boss. Speaking of Dick, he and Aunt Harriet are coming down the stairs. Bruce offers fishing, and Dick gets excited. He knows what the code word means. Worth mentioning, he’s holding a toy plane. How old is Robin in this universe? 

  

Bruce answers the phone, and Gordon tells him he’ll never guess who’s on the loose. His arch enemy, the Riddler. How soon can you get to headquarters? Be there in a flash. Bruce lifts the head of the bust on the desk, and Dick turns the knob to open the secret entrance. Behind the bookcase we see the Batpoles, used to access the Batcave. We know this because it’s written on the wall. Who is that for? Bruce and Dick know which pole is theirs, Giggity. They know where they lead. We the audience are smart enough to figure out who’s who. Seriously, who is the labeling for? For that matter, does Aunt Harriet ever question the red phone with only one button? It’s maddening, I tell you, maddening, and we’re only to the opening credits. 

  

Batman and Robin land at the bottom of the poles. Wait, how’d they chance costumes while sliding? Does the pole stop at the outfit room, then they slide down to the main cave? Does Bruce stand there waiting as Dick fixes his hair, so they can slide down together? So many questions. Too many questions. Appropriate with all these questions that our special guest villain is the Riddler, Frank Gorshin. That’s how he was billed. I wanna be a special guest villain. Anyhow, the dynamic duo get in the Batmobile. Atomic batteries to power, turbines to speed. Wait, the Batmobile is atomic? Ah, the 60’s. They leave the cave and begin the 14 mile drive to town. Upon arrival, they park right in front of police headquarters. In this iteration, Batman isn’t a vigilante, he’s an asset, and welcomed by the police. Batman repeats the orange riddle, and Robin says they both must be peeled. Chief O’Hara says they’re idiots and should’ve figured that out. Robin says it should be a clue to the real crime. Batman says the Riddler is like an artichoke, and you have to pull leaves to get to the heart. Gordon reminds them of the exploding cake. Batman says it was merely a ruse, to get him called in. Gordon says that he’s the Riddler’s deadly nemesis. Deadly? Hardly. Batman refuses to take a life. Robin says that the crime is no fun unless the Riddler can outwit them. Batman says it’s artistic the way he- that’s it! The Peale Art Gallery! That’s what the riddler was pointing to. Gordon orders his men into action. Knowing their incompetence, Batman says no. Besides, it could be a trap. 

  

Peale Art Gallery. Batman and Robin pull up, and prepare to enter, when the red Batphone in the car goes off. Batman speaking. Then we hear it. The maniacal, hysterical, gleeful laugh of Gorshin’s Riddler. Riddle me this, there are three men in a boat with four cigarettes and no matches, how do they manage to smoke? Robin wants to know what he’s up to. Batman says they’ll ask. He goes to his utility belt to get the bat-a-rang. It’s in the compartment of the same name. Point of order, Ash Ketchum knows what Pokemon is in what ball without looking, or labeling, because he knows what slot they’re in on his belt. Batman, I ask you, who is the labeling for? Who?? They climb the side of the building as Robin complains that he can’t get the riddle. Batman thinks maybe his mind is on the cute teenager who waved at him. Jealous, Bruce? 

  

They look in the window, and see the Riddler pointing a gun at the man behind the desk. Category is, special guest villain eleganza. Riddler is serving up black bowler hat and button down, matching green tie, pants and jacket, all adorned with question marks. Girl is looking fierce! Batman puts the bat-a-rang away, and gets the bat insta-welder to get the bars off the window. Um, I’m pretty sure that’s breaking and entering. Robin prepares to throw the bars to the ground, but after a warning from Batman, as well as the placement of a suction cup bat hook that magically sticks to stucco, they set the bars aside and break through the window, not once checking to see if it was unlatched. 

  

Batman tells Riddler to freeze, but he runs. A flash grenade causes him to fall over in the hall. As a duly deputized agent of the law, he places Riddler under arrest. How do police deputize someone who’s name they don’t know? Oh well. Riddler smiles as Robin goes for the bat cuffs. Out of nowhere, photographers take pictures of Batman trying to cuff the Riddler. Riddler tells him he tried to warn them. The curator tells Batman that the cross belongs to the Riddler, and was on loan for a show. But he saw him take it at gunpoint. The Riddler points the gun at Batman, and pulls the trigger. It sets off a flame. Robin realizes the answer to the riddle. They throw a cigarette overboard, and make the boat a cigarette lighter. The Ridder reminds the duo of the cameras and says, what is something no one wants to have, but no man wants to lose? Answer? A lawsuit! Correct, boy wonder. Riddler summons a henchman to serve them. He says this makes his life, and he’ll see them in court. Exit the Riddler, laughing his ass off from the joygasm. 

  

Wayne Manor. News broadcast, that the one million dollar lawsuit, for assault, slander, and false arrest, may stick. Plus, Batman would have to reveal his real identity in court. If that happens, he wouldn’t be able to fight crime in Gotham. Alright, but why? Couldn’t the police just hire Bruce outright? Their logic is flawed. Bruce says it isn’t about the money, it’s about his identity. Everything he’s trained for after his parents were murdered, gone. Again, get hired on officially. It’s not that hard. Gordon’s men were able to do it, and they’re self-proclaimed idiots. Alfred says they’ll think of something. Cause if Harriet finds out what Master Dick has been doing on these supposed fishing trips… He trails off. Dick reminds Bruce of what the Riddler said when they got served. When they finish with that, look for two more. Great Scott! Could there be hidden writing on the document? As someone who’s worked in legal, there’s always fine print in a document. To the Batcave!

  

They’re in their costumes. Perhaps there’s a rule about only seeing Batman and Robin in the cave, not Bruce and Dick. At any rate, they find the hidden riddles. First, when is the time of a clock like the whistle of a train? When it’s two to two! Toot toot toot! Oh, Robin. Second, what has neither flesh, bone, nor nail, yet has four fingers and a thumb? A glove of course! Holy smartass answer, Batman! Could it be an address? Yes, 222 Glover Ave. I hope we’re not too late. As we get a rear view of the Batmobile, it has a Gotham license plate. I’m guessing the car is registered under “Batman”, but does the reminder get mailed to Wayne Manor, or is there a PO Batbox somewhere? 

  

Meanwhile, in the hidden lair of the Molehill Mob, a groovy chick is rocking out. She dips a spoon into the giant tub of caviar, which you shouldn’t do. Metal reacts with the fish eggs and changes the taste. It should be bone. Family guy taught me that. Mobster tells Molly to lay off, it’s full of calories, and she’ll blow up. Ah, 60’s sexism. She doesn’t care, she’s hungry. He cares. If she gets fat, she won’t fit in manholes, then what use will she be? Yikes. No man hole action for you, pig. Riddler enters and tells them to stop bickering. This time he’s sporting his green unitard, purple belt, gloves, and mask. I love a coordinated villain. Why he needs a belt, I’ll never know. He orders them down the tunnels. Batman has had time to solve the clues. Just because he has, doesn’t mean he did. 

  

222 Glover, What a Way to Go Go. It’s the new discotheque. As the duo prepares to exit the Batmobile, the bouncer says the boy is underage. Batman says it’s the law. Funny, breaking the bars of Peale and entering was against the law too. So’s diddling a minor. Pick and choose I suppose. Robin takes the Batmobile and sets up the Bat scanner; a devise that allows him to see inside the club, but not from a vantage point on Batman, no, just all over in the club. Batman enters, and we see people dancing. The cigarette girl offers to check his cape. Groupies. Molly and mobster watch as Batman approaches the bar. He orders a fresh orange juice. Molly asks if he’s looking for a friend. She’s got a problem. Why is a quarrel like a bargain? Answer, it takes two to make it. Like a dance. Shall we? You’re not man enough for him, sweetie. Batman downs his juice in one swallow. Even I know he’s been roofied at this point. Stupid Bat-twat. He goes with her to the dance floor. He is vengeance! He is the night! He is doing the Batusi! That is, until the drugs kick in, and he goes down right there on the dance floor. What is this, Babylon? 

  

Outside, the voyeur wonder saw the whole thing happen. He prepares to go inside, but first, he moves a plate over the label for the anti-theft device, so that it reads “Start Button” instead. Again, who are the labels for?? Riddler emerges from a trap door, and tranques Robin. Riddler checks his pulse, then gets into the driver’s seat. After a moment of glee that his plan is working, Riddler pushes the alleged start button. Alarms and fireworks go off. People are watching all of this happen, and just stand there, by the way. Riddler orders his henchmen to grab the boy. He then throws a grenade into the Batmobile to blow it up. Too bad it has anti-fire measures, and more lives than a cat. Villains escape, as Batman stumbles out of the club. He has to go after Robin! The cops arrive, and ask Batman for his keys. He’s in no condition to drive. Look! Up in the sky! It’s the Batsignal! He’s in no condition for that either. He bangs the steering wheel, wondering about Robin.

  

Riddler’s lair. Robin is placed on a table and strapped down, as a vice is placed near his head. Molly offers the Riddler a scalpel. Holy bulge Batman! Riddler is very happy to have Robin in his clutches. Like, really happy. That or Frank is just packing the goods. Dunno what it is about a nice unitard, but, oh, sorry, the show. Yes, the vice is being tightened on Robin’s head. Time for the caped crusader to take his final bow. Will this be the ghastly end of the dynamic duo? Find out tomorrow! Same bat time! Same bat channel! 

  

All the episodes were two parters, and looking at the menu on the DVD, they made them rhyme. We won’t know what Riddler does to Robin until the next installment. Will Robin discover he kinda likes being tied up? Will Batman be jealous, even though he wasn’t giving Robin what he needed? Will Riddler ever come up with a Riddle that Gordon and the police can solve? Perhaps. Until next time, stay geeky, and keep gabbing!

  

Invader Zim – The Nightmare Begins

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By Joshie Jaxon

 
Some may argue that Invader Zim is too new to be featured on our site, which is devoted to all things retro. However, Invader Zim is fourteen years old, and a cult classic. I’m counting it. Besides, I appreciate the humor in it now, more than I ever did when it was new. I didn’t follow Zim during it’s initial run, so there’s no real nostalgia to this one for me. All jokes will be made strictly from my adult standpoint and observation. Let the geeks begin! 

  

Welcome, Irken soldiers, to Conventia, the convention hall planet. An entire planet just for conventions? I wonder if Comic Con thought of expanding there? Can you picture Hiddleston standing in Hall Gleeb, shouting “Kneel!”? I can, but then again I usually picture Tom Hiddleston telling me to kneel. That’s a story for another day. Conventia has complimentary teleporters, as well as a gift shop, for lots of cheap, useless, stuff. Their words not mine. I love when shows have quality humor. Speaking of, the Irkens walk past someone holding an X-Ray machine. Now, I thought the Irkens were insects, since they have antennae and big bug eyes, but they seem humanoid, because they have skeletons, as opposed to the traditional insect exoskeleton. Relevance? None. Just another fun factoid that you’ve come to expect.

  

As the convention hall that they are in fills, we’re told to wiggle our antennae in salute to our powerful leaders, Almighty Tallest Red and Almighty Tallest Purple. Irken society places value on hight, as opposed to skill, it would seem. I though gay men were the size queens. Red tells Purple that the laser show was a success. Purple says a fog machine would have worked, and then the poor guys gets hit in the eye with a laser. Red tells the audience they are the finest warriors, but they’ve selected their choices for Operation Impending Doom 2! Now with 47% more doom! These superior ones, but not quite as superior as the Almighty ones, will be assigned to an enemy planet. There, they will blend in to their native society, gather crucial information, assessing the planet’s weakness, making it vulnerable for their invading big, spaceship, gang. The armada? Yes!

  

  

Let the assigning begin! The first invader steps up, and is assigned to the planet of the slaughtering rat-people. The invader has tears in his eyes, and starts to stammer. Wouldn’t you? However, because of this invaders increased height, he’ll be assigned to the planet that is home to the universe’s most comfortable couch. Um, why is that planet an enemy? They won’t share their couch technology? Whatevs. Cut to a ship making it’s way to Conventia. We hear shouting to get out of the way. Someone has road rage. Is it still called road rage in space? There aren’t any roads. Space rage? Anyhow, the sorting ends with the last, and shortest, Irken being assigned to the planet of the slaughtering rat-people. This Irkan is ready to cry too. Oh well. Sorting over, help yourself to nachos. You mooches. 

  

Zim shoves his way to the front of the crowd. He begs the tallest’s forgiveness. He couldn’t find his invitation. That’s because he wasn’t invited. Apparently Zim had been banished to FoodCourtia. Zim quit when he found out about the assigning. He quit being banished? Yep. He’s a strong, independent, green Irken, that don’t need no man. Red and Purple tell him the sorting is over. Zim says they can’t do this without him. He was in Operation Impending Doom 1. They remember. Flashback to Zim in a giant mech, ala Power Rangers or Voltron, smashing and blasting his way across the planet. His troops tell him they’re still on their own planet. Zim orders them to keep turning knobs and pulling levers. 

  

Hey, he put the fires out. No, he made them worse. Besides, no invader has ever been so, small. Zim says invader blood runs in his veins, and not to deny him. To thank Zim for his service in the past, Red reaches into the front of his pants, and gives him a sandwich. But, he’s allergic to nuts. Sorry, had to. The tallest decide to send him to a planet so mysterious, no one knows where it is, and those who do, dare not speak it’s name. Zim asks for the name. Purple says he dare not speak it. Zim asks where it is, and they point to a post-it that says “planet?” on it. A secret mission. Score! 

  

On Earth, we see a boy on a rooftop, listening to the transmission from Red and Purple about the universe belonging to the Irken empire. He scrambles into the house to warn his family. Not now son, I’m making… Toast! Dib’s sister, Gaz, doesn’t care either. Dib can’t even tell them who’s coming. 

  

Back with the Irkens, it’s time to get your SIR, Strategic Information Robot. All the fancy models are obedient to a fault. Zim can’t wait to have his own robot slave. Red says they have a special model for him. Red goes through the recycle bin, while Purple prevents Zim from peeking. After assembling spare parts, and the contents of their pockets, they present Zim with his robot. He takes one look at it, and says it doesn’t look good. Uh, that’s what the enemy will think. Zim buys it, and is honored to be trusted with such advanced technology. The robot activates, and introduces itself as Gir. Zim asks what the G is for. Gir doesn’t know. He pulls a derp face and sticks out his tongue as he hits himself in the head. Zim asks if it’s supposed to be stupid. It’s not stupid, it’s “advanced”. In their spaceship, Zim tells Gir that it’s time for them to rain doom down on their doomed enemies, on their doomed planet, in their doomed solar system, in the doomed universe! I may have made some of that up. Gir says he’s gonna sing the doom song now. Sing it with me now, doom, doom, doom, doom…

  

Six months later, Gir is still singing, and Zim is in a stupidity coma. He’s checked out to avoid brain damage from the doom song. That doom, doom doom doom doom. He comes to, and is ready to kill Gir. The sensor tells him they are approaching a planet. Zim asks Gir to stop. Gir holds up a finger, and finishes the verse. Then he gets excited. Zim explains that they’ll need to set up a base of operations. Time for Gir’s advanced technology. Observe what Earthlings consider to be normal, so they can make their disguises accordingly. Gir looks around like a puppy going for his first car ride. Zim finds a spot to park the cruiser, and says this is where they will build. He asks Gir what he learned. I saw a squirrel! Oh, Gir. 

  

Zim goes to a control panel and selects a disguise. It’s so good, that Gir doesn’t recognize him, and wonders where his master went. Zim says that Gir should be a dog. Gir wants to be a mongoose dog. Quiet! Do you want to wake up the whole planet? “I dooo”. After Gir has his green dog suit on, they begin to design their home. Zim draws up a plan, and sets it in a capsule that drills into the Earth. He and Gir hide, as the drill reaches it’s depth, and extends outward, building their house, and underground base. It attaches itself to the neighboring homes, and saps some of their resources. Lawn gnomes, flamingoes, and an I heart Earth flag complete the design. Zim grabs Gir’s leash, and walks him to the front door. Two half-assed robots stand there, and say welcome home, son. The illusion is flawless. So is the interior design. A toilet in the kitchen? That is so totally Earth.

  

Zim wants to find the fastest way to learn about the planet so they can conquer the giant ball of filthy dirt. He decides to enroll in skool. Yes, it’s spelled that way. Mrs. Bitters introduces Zim as the latest useless appendage to the education system. Zim then introduces himself as a perfectly normal human worm baby. Pay no attention to him, and you’ll be fine. Dib is in the class, and has a horrified look on his face. Today’s lesson is on outer space. Bitters says the the universe is doomed to implode on itself. Zim asks in the event of a full alien invasion, how prepared the Earth would be. Smooth. Dib can’t take it. Is he the only one who sees the alien in class? The students all look around. Dib calls out Zim as one of the monsters he’s been talking about. Zim gets ready to push his self-destruct armband. 

  

The students call Dib crazy. Dib points out Zim’s green skin, and lack of ears. Zim says it’s a skin condition. Dib tries again to point out Zim’s lack of human features. The kids are sick of hearing it. Jumping on the bandwagon, Zim says he’s always like that. Dib shouts that he just got there. Dib says there’s finally a way for him to prove that he’s… “Crazy” Zim adds. Ah, the students can see that. Dib and Zim stare each other down, as Bitters repeats doomed, doomed, doomed. Foreshadowing?

  

After school, Dib says that Zim’s disguise may have fooled the others, but not him. He’ll bring Zim before them without his disguise. He has alien handcuffs, guaranteed to work. Zim laughs. How will they work if he’s never met an alien before? He has, right now. Dib chases Zim through town. Zim shouts to be left alone, he just wants to be normal. They fight atop a bus, but Zim falls onto a fence. Pitiful human! He shouts, before being promptly mauled by a dog. Dib searches the bushes for signs of Zim. Zim gets behind him, and shoves him into the yard with the dog. 

  

Gir! Help! Gir rockets through town to get Zim, and blasts back to their house. Only problem with that plan is that they left a smoke trail to follow. Dib shows up, and Zim orders Gir inside. It’s too late. Dib knows where you live now. He’ll wait forever if he has to. A lawn gnome targets the handcuffs, and destroys them. Inside the house, we can hear Dib still shouting from outside about how he’s going to prepare, and blah, blah, blah. Zim tells Gir he feels good about how the day went. 

  

On the good ship Almighty Tallest, they receive an incoming transmission from Earth. Neither of them knows what Earth is. They are surprised to see Zim on screen, and alive. Zim says the mission is going well. He’ll have the planet taken care of before the armada can even arrive. Invader Zim, signing off. Red and Purple just blink and the screen. Shouldn’t have underestimated the little guy. He’s got something to prove. Until next time, everyone. Stay geeky, and keep gabbing. 

  

Top 5 Tuesday- Digi-Feels?!?

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–by Bevianna Bones

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Good evening, afternoon, morning, or whatever it may be to you, readers; today I want to talk to you about something special; today I want to discuss the times that video games have given me the feels. It doesn’t happen often, but when games bring the feels out in a gamer it’s an important event. Inspired by my recent play through of The Last of Us, I thought to myself, “self, this is game is a genuine experience to play.” And then I thought, to myself, “self, the last time you felt this many feels from a video game was when you broke down your brother’s bedroom door to weep, blubberous, sobs into his arms because Sephiroth had just impaled Aerith…” So in the spirit of getting the feels on, I bring you my top five moments games have brought me the feels. Not always the sad feels, mind you, just so long as there was a genuine emotion produced, (other than delight of simply playing) it was enough of a qualifier for the candidate to make it on the list. Here they are, in no particular order…

5. The Last of Us

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I challenge anyone to play this masterpiece of a game and not have a single moment of feels. Naughty Dog so splendidly captured the human spirit, they in every way earned all of the accolades and awards this game was bestowed. “Dis is da most human zaambie ting you half evah seen…” Oh wait, that was Arnold talking about his role in Maggie. Nonetheless, this is a great game, and a great experience that tugs on your heart strings in all ways. Suspense, horror, hope, fear, love and loss; this one’s got it all.

4. Final Fantasy VII-Aerith’s Death

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I was 16 when Final Fantasy VII came out for the PS1, and when I first played it, it was single handedly the greatest game experience I had ever witnessed. The only things I had ever loved as much up to that point were Final Fantasy Adventure and my dog. (This still holds true in most cases)  As I played through this adventure for the first time, it was on a 5″ B&W television I had hard wired (via much splicing) my PS1 into. Much was lost in the beauty of the game, but it still sucked me in nevertheless. I became fully engrossed in the story and the characters, and then, one sad evening that bastard Sephiroth had to go and slay Aeris. Even though I knew it was coming, it still produced all kinds of feels and my brother was left to pick up the pieces of a weeping Bevianna.

3.Resident Evil-Cerebrus’ Hallway

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Who let the dogs out?! The first installment was a masterpiece in it’s own right. Albeit, awards for its Oscar-worthy voice acting performances aside. By no means does it live up to games in the current gen consoles (all though, the hd remake of the GameCube remake is a beautiful experience); not only did this first game really pushed the limits of the original PS1, but it was a completely new venture for Capcom, and introduced the world to “survival horror” games.  I had borrowed this game over a long weekend from a friend. My brother and I sat in the basement, playing all day, all night to try and complete it without using a strategy guide. The initial scare that was genuinely dealt out when Jill walks down the hallway for the first time and the Cerebrus jump through the windows will never be matched.  Except of course if they cast original Jill into more voice acting roles.

2. Dead Space:Extraction

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“What’s this?!”, I say, as I’m browsing the cheepy bin at Gamestop…a “game of the year” for the Wii that doesn’t have Mario on it? Actually made by a third party developer? Why not?! I have to see this to even believe it.  Dead Space: Extraction was the Wii integration of the Dead Space franchise. A space-horror rail shooter. Maybe it was the motion controls, or the notion of being abandoned in a space mine with terrible space creatures…or both…but this game legitimately pulled me into, at often times, an unpleasant sensory experience. All the while, from start to finish, the game never loses sight of the suspense it was intended to put you in. Most deserving of the E3 GOTY award it received, and by far the most horrific experience available on the Wii, aside from trying to play Dance on Broadway with a group of drunken lesbians.

5. ET: The Extra Terrestrial

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Alright, I’m not just trying to be funny here, but for me and many other gamers out there, this was the first time there was a resounding and accurate sense of “what the fuck?!?” ever created in digital form. And never has there been since. Perhaps, if Atari had thought a wee bit wiser, they could have remarketed the project to the military as a “confusion inducer,” rather than burying the lot of them in a giant landfill. Why does ET keep falling in holes? Why does he look like a pixel penis? And why does a man in a lab coat suddenly and randomly appear?? Howard Scott Warshaw was trying to make the most epic Atari cartridge ever, but sadly it was a rush job and limited by the hardware itself, so the nuances got lost in translation. Much like my Star Wars post… Oh the irony…

Until next time…I’m off to weep over the YouTube video I just saw that suggests that Cloud actually killed Aerith…le sob…le really big sob!!!

–BB

Ghostwriter – Ghost Story, Part 1

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By Joshie Jaxon
In a time before cable and satellite were as common as they are now, we had something called public broadcasting. This showed us the educational programming of Sesame Street, Today’s Special, the Electric Company, Square One, and one of my personal favorites, Ghostwriter. I adored this show, and I’m sure that it influenced and fueled my current passion for writing. I can still remember certain plot points for some of the mysteries. I used to write the Ghostwriter symbol on my homework. I was hooked. Because reading is what? Fundamental! Let the geeks begin! 

  

Brownstone basement, Brooklyn. Jamal Jenkins, and his dad are looking for a trunk. His father is played by none other than Samuel L Jackson. Yes, Nick Fury was on public television, and we applaud him for it. If he can’t find that trunk, he’s gonna need a uhaul to get Jamal’s sister to college. Or just use the helicarrier. They find the trunk, on a shelf in the middle of the basement. Father Fury says that it belonged to great grandpa Ezra. As they pull it out, a book falls off the back of it and opens. We see the pages glow, and the yet unchristened Ghostwriter emerges. It flies around the room, trying to find something to read. It settles on the word, “positively” on Jamal’s shirt. Jamal and his dad carry the trunk upstairs, unaware of the ghostly hitchhiker. 

  

Brooklyn at night. A young black kid walks the streets, doing kicks, with arms carrying groceries. As Jamal walks near the park, he sees flashlights and a mask-wearing gang. They’re making fight noises, and moving around. This isn’t Shakespeare in the park. The gang shines their lights on the faces, and we see green monster type faces. Jamal goes to leave, but has to look one more time. This time, they’re gone. Jamal leaves, and we see that the gang was still watching him. Creepy. 

  

Back at the brownstone, Jamal’s sister is asking their mother where her bracket is. Mother Jenkins replies with “why would I have it?”, and makes me love her. Sister can’t get her trunk closed. Father Fury has Hulk come close it for her. Actually, he just tells her to jump on it a few times. So much for respecting Ezra’s trunk. Danitra heads upstairs, stopping to tell Jamal that she left her computer for him, and not to break it. Grandma Jenkins takes the groceries, and says she’s making her famous caramel cake. Jamal can’t have any. It’s only for girls going to college. It’s tough to be a young kid in ’92. He gets a computer but no cake. Jamal heads upstairs, and closes the door. Tossing his jacket on the bed, he sits at his desk and turns the monitor on. As he starts typing to the computer, “positively” on his shirt starts to glow, and Ghostwriter searches the room for something to read. 

  

Meanwhile, Jamal is introducing himself to the computer. No, really. He’s typing, “hello, computer. My name is Jamal. Ready for one dynamite dude?”. Siri is a few decades away, my friend. He looks at a sticker on the wall, and notices it’s glowing. In traditional fashion, he backs away from the desk, stands, and looks scared as Ghostwriter enters the computer. Then in a different font we see, “HELP! HELP! HELP! HELP! Where are the children? Are they all right?”. Aloud, Jamal asks what children, and who the spirit is, while examining the monitor. He calls his sister in, and points at the computer, asking what it is. “A computer. The one I’m letting you have”. I love snarky people. He tells her to read the screen, but she doesn’t see anything there. She tells him if he can’t use it, to at least be appreciative, or at least sane. I’m sad she’s going to college. I want to see more of her. Not knowing how to deal with whatever is in the computer, he unplugs it. Danitra calls for him to come for a sec. He says he’s busy. She says please, and calls him Jammy-Jam. He follows her out of the room, and Ghostwriter leaves the computer for the comfort of Jamal’s backpack.

  

The next morning, we see Gaby and Alex walking to school. She’s droning on about Floridian weather, as Alex gets bored. I remember having the biggest boy crush on Alex as a kid. I didn’t understand it at the time, but I knew he looked good and I liked that. Anyhow, Gaby stops to tie her shoe, and rather than waiting, Alex walks off. It’s worth pointing out that Gaby is sporting hoop earrings, a side ponytail, and bangs. She’s in elementary school. Out of nowhere, a masked figure grabs her backpack and runs off. Thanks for nothing, Alex. To be fair, I know what it’s like to be the older brother, and not wanting to have your little sister tagging along all the time. 

  

Jamal passes the same park from the prior night. Distracted, he gets bumped into by Lenni. The two apologize for not watching where they were standing/walking. At the same time, Ghostwriter moves from Jamal’s backpack to Lenni’s. Lenni has all kinds of fringe on her jacket. Auntie Noxie would be proud. Jamal leaves, and Lenni sits to work on her new song. Jamal looks at the area the gang was in, and finds a green button that says THABTO, as well as a blue paper with a coded message on it. Gang people sure are careless. On the bench, Lenni is working on a rhyme to complete her verse. Kids bop, rap edition just made her an offer, and she needs dope lyrics, yo. It hurt to type that. She finds that perfect phrase, and as she finishes writing it down, Ghostwriter leaves her backpack, and rearranges her words to ask where dynamite dude Jamal is. Um, perhaps he should’ve realized from homework that I’m sure had Lenni’s name on it, as well as the fact he traded backpacks, that Jamal isn’t around. Silly ghost. Lenni shoves the open notebook to the ground, and pokes it with a stick. She reopens it, and Ghostwriter says “Lenni fights for what’s right”. Lenni cautiously picks her book back up, and goes to school. 

  

Speaking of school, Jamal just found a threatening note in his locker, on familiar blue paper. “Near the park, after dark. You were there, so beware!!! THABTO”. Not looking at all scared, Jamal compares the button he found to the note. Lenni storms up to him, and wants to know how he did it. She dares him to change the letters around. He doesn’t know what she’s talking about, and accuses her of leaving the note in his locker. She didn’t write it, and doesn’t know what a THABTO is. Lenni suggests he throw the stuff away. He tells her no, it’s just interesting enough to be fun. Ghostwriter reads the note, and both of them see him do it. On a nearby bulletin board, Ghostwriter says, “Careful after dark, my children”. He’s getting a little possessive. Get it? Ghost. Possessive. It’s spirit humor. Never mind. Jamal and Lenni realize they’re the only ones who can see the message. Jamal says she should come over after school; he’s got something to show her. Horny teenager. 

  

The bodega. Gaby is regaling her parents with the take of the backpack thief. Papa Fernandez asks if she told the teacher. She did. Turns out that several other students have also had their backpacks stolen. Papa addresses Alex in Spanish. Something to the effect of watching out for his sister. In English, Alex apologizes. Papa says he’s supposed to walk Gaby to school. Alex replies in Spanish. Gaby says it wasn’t his fault. In Spanish, Alex is told to walk her all the way to school. Comprende? Si, Papa. Backpack, school books, lunch money. It all costs! Lenni enters the store, and begins shopping. Alex rings her up, as she comments on his new detective novel. He thinks he already knows who did it. She asks why he should finish it. So that he knows if he’s right. Music plays from upstairs. Papa Eduardo says he wishes he didn’t have to hear it through his walls. Cut to upstairs where a band is rehearsing. Lenni enters and sets the groceries down. Lenni asks if she can go to Jamal’s. Daddy Frazier wants to know if he knows Jamal. She says they met once at a dance. He says it’s fine, but to be home in an hour. 

  

Brownstone of S.H.I.E.L.D. Father Fury asks if that was the last of Danitra’s stuff, cause there won’t be room for them if she has any more. Danitra hugs grandma Jenkins, who is apparently a postal worker, and thanks her for the food. Hugs and kisses to grams and Jammy-Jam. Grandma says that next it’ll be Jamal going off to school. Doorbell. Lenni has arrived. After introductions, Jamal says they’re gonna go upstairs and work on the computer. She tells them to have fun. Alright, I know they’re not full-on hormonally raging teens just yet, but there’s no issue at all with them wanting to hang out in Jamal’s room? Alone? Really, PBS?

  

In the room of non-sexual tension, Jamal is showing Lenni the blank screen. She pulls out her notebook, since that’s where it appeared for her, and sets it on the keyboard. Jamal asks aloud who and what Ghostwriter is, but no reply. He know what they can do while they wait. Bow chicka bow bow! Kidding. He’s gonna work on that coded note. Lenni thinks it might be Greek or Russian. If only they could speak or read it. Lenni suggests a mirror, but that doesn’t help. Jamal has the idea that it may be written in a code. Brilliant! Lenni knows a guy that may be able to help. Any guesses, class? That’s right, it’s Alex. Downstairs, grandma is getting ready to go to the store. We see Ghostwriter read her list. She calls up to the kids that she’s leaving and will be right back. A couple of kids, home alone. You know what’s gonna happen. Yep, Ghostwriter comes back and wants to know what in the world cornflakes are. Well, Ghostwriter, they were originally invented to keep boys from touching themselves. However, now they’re just part of a balanced breakfast. Jamal and Lenni shout multiple questions at the monitor, but get no answer. Finally, Ghostwriter asks why they don’t answer him. Followed by ANSWER ME! ANSWER ME! ANSWER ME! ANSWER ME! Told ya he was possessed. Credits 

  

Alright, I know they ended on a cliffhanger, and that’s fine, but here’s what I wanna know; who was Ghostwriter before he was a ghost? It’s never covered in the series, mainly cause I believe it was canceled before it was revealed. That being said, I did a little research. Those who don’t wanna know, I’m gonna call spoiler alert, and tell you to stop reading right now. This is from Wikipedia – Ghostwriter producer and writer Kermit Frazier revealed in a 2010 interview that Ghostwriter was the ghost of a runaway slave during the American Civil War. He taught other slaves how to read and write and was killed by slave catchers and their dogs. His soul was kept in the book that Jamal first discovered in the pilot episode, and when Jamal opened the book he was freed.
I think whoever added that entry didn’t see this episode recently, because Jamal never discovered or opened the book, it was circumstance. What I really wanna know is why no one else in the Jenkins clan ever opened that book before that episode. That’s a question for another day. Until next time. Stay geeky, and keep gabbing.